Monopoly is Evil!
I HATE the board game Monopoly. I can’t understand why people enjoy playing this godforsaken game. It’s the epitome of everything I hate in life: money, greed, dishonesty, and especially basic math. Ew.
I’m one of those rare people who just generally dislikes games. I couldn’t care less about sports. There’s not a competitive bone in my body. Board games are repetitive and boring. Any kind of party game where I have to dance, be blindfolded, or spin around is simply not going to happen.
There are some exceptions to this rule. I fully embrace drinking games. I loooove trivia. I watch Jeopardy EVERY night. But that’s about it.
Games just seem like a waste of time. Why play a board game when you could, I dunno, have an authentic intellectual conversation?! As much as I love shouting “Sorry!” or “Jenga!” at the top of my lungs (I so totally DON’T), I would rather hear someone talk about their passions or their fears or what they ate for breakfast last Tuesday. Fuck “Family Game Night”! How about we have a “Family Actually has a Meaningful F-ing Conversation Night” instead?
End Rant.
But if you'd like to purchase said evil board game:
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